A humble Malaysian's poetry blog, with a bit of fluff here and there. Reflections on love, life, spirituality, the human psyche and yes, the dark rivers of the heart.

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No lyrics harmed in the making of this blog.

about me

> malaysian
> catholic
> iban
> computer nerd
> ex-CSSUPMer
> male
> introvert
> slacker
> sophisticatedly uncomplicated
> romantically unromantic
> desperate for glory
> arsenal fan (help!)
> hard to impress
> still sane
> can be an ass
> drives like an ass
> devil's advocate
> tells it like it is
> sucker for pets

A Mother's Poem

⊆ 8:12 PM by Pete | ˜ 0 comments »

When I’m gone,
will you remember me?

My moment of passing,
or of our journey?

Am I to you,
as you are to me

My little one and only?
The journey we had,
the hugs and kisses

When I gave up my dreams,
and gave you yours

When I told you
what I needed to

Did I raise you to be,
who I wanted you to be?

Or did I teach you to be,
who you needed to be?

Had I failed you, and if I had, would it matter if I'm sorry?
But no matter what, those days of struggle,
with you to cuddle

I’d do it again –all of it,
exactly the same

From that special moment
when I saw you

To the moment
when I’ll see you last

The bond we shared
Is our secret, and ours alone
For you are my baby
And I am your Mother
Who loves you
like no other.

⊆ 9:23 AM by Pete | ˜ 3 comments »

I lie awake
In the still of the night

Talking to myself again...
As the sound of your voice,
Carries through
the breeze
As whispers in my ears,
As many nights before
As I see you again,
Time and again
And time again,
Only to lose you again..
And in my heart,
I wonder
If it's worth the pain,
The trials and tribulations
Standing between us
and this thing we have...
Will it last somehow,
or be lost forever
In the land of our dreams?
But wherever the answer lies,
or where it cares be
One thing for certain is,
I'm losing my mind...
To have but a shadow of you...
But not to be with you...
Not to laugh with you...
Not to cry with you...
Not to touch your face...
Not being there
To make your tears go away...
Without you,
I'd rather we've never met
Than to have met,
and be torn apart..

⊆ 7:13 AM by Pete | ˜ 2 comments »

Discordant the hues, of the jingle-bell blues
As snowflakes adrift in the wake of a moon
Despondent a man, upon a snow-white satire..
Despondent a man, beneath a snow-crusted spire.

To him, is fate, things not to be
To him, is fate, a winter's touch
To him is fate, within the pale-white pall
Pale-white pall for a fall
Silent and cold and still
A touch of salvation's full.

His thoughts to self, what dreams have I?
-a slice bit through his skin-
What dreams have I? no more
buried beneath a winter's past
What dreams have I? to wait in vain
all emptied, all hollowed
All gone, asunder, away my grasping breath!
Who wields my fate? and tears away
Who deigns it be, the relief of his release?

Beneath a white-bleached sky he lay,

a crumpled heap- A bag,
a pile of skin and bones-
a dagger to his throat-
I left him there,sans hands in pocket
Cold as a winter's grasp
Heard I, a cry, a whimpered hymn
-I whistled it too-
A happy tune it was... melodious,
as the jingle-bell blues.